Shopping Anxiety

I was across town last Thursday and decided to do some grocery shopping to kill some time, so I hit that neighborhood’s supermarket. It’s an Albertson’s, a fairly new and fancy one, a real shrine to all that is pre-packaged, ready to eat or quick to prepare. I don’t usually like shopping in these stores but it was there and we were low on some essentials.

It’s the old story for me again – I have been trying to shop at more local, sustainable venues, like my corner cooperative for organic produce and other foodstuffs (how lucky is that!), our local healthy food supermarket for other things, and in general just cutting way back on the packaged stuff and unsustainable containers. But the gleaming, ultra-convenient items in the Albertson’s-type stores continue to beckon, especially when I’m tired, short on time, or just happen to be there for some other reason. Or, if I’m out of balance, unfortunately the norm for me lately, and by that I mean not eating and cooking mindfully, not exercising enough, overextended, blah, blah, blah.

Anyway… so here I was at Albertson’s. No shopping list, just away from my kitchen full of dirty dishes piled on the counters, and no dinner plan. Of course the place smelled like roasting chickens, so that was a thought. “But God knows where those chickens came from or how they were raised,” wondered the sustainability angel on my shoulder. So scratch that idea. Maybe some healthy wraps… someone was telling me recently they had some delicious blackened tofu wraps from Huckleberry’s. Perhaps there’s something like that here… nah, but there’s a deli, and maybe I can ask if they can make a veggie wrap, with some spinach and a little cheese. So I ordered a few of those for us for dinner, and went on my merry way. Unfortunately, the wraps arrived in little hard plastic containers with lids. Continuing along, we still needed some staples for other meals beyond tonight. The wraps idea was still in my head, so I morphed that into burritos and bought some whole grain tortillas, a can of veggie refried beans, a block of cheese, and a bag of brown basmati rice. And I wanted to bring some snacks to my son’s class tomorrow, so I grabbed a bag of sugar snap peas and some pre-cut carrots. Anticipating future fatigue and lack of interest in cooking (maybe it’s the time of year, that dreary, drippy, can’t-decide-if-it’s-winter-or-spring time of year), so I picked up some frozen Amy’s entrées. Well, at least those are organic and sort of healthy. We needed shampoo, too, but I am still exploring the option of refilling some containers I have with bulk shampoo that I think I remember Huckleberry’s carrying.

I tried to stay out of the center aisles as much as I could.

The point of all this blathering is that I want to highlight how complicated I’ve let my shopping decisions become. No wonder I get so tired! I can’t just run to the store for a bottle of shampoo anymore. I think about the shampoo itself, its packaging, how I can reduce or avoid the packaging, etc. And for the comestibles, there’s the organic question, the health benefits (sure, those chips may be organic, but it’s still a lot of fat and salt), whether or not it was produced locally, whether it was produced by a company whose philosophies I agree with, how much gas I had to burn to buy it, and loads of other issues. I can’t meet all of these expectations, but I try. And in thinking about them, and planning for them, it gets pretty exhausting. I’m already baking our bread, making our yogurt, and mixing up our own granola. It’s hard to think of adding to that list when my life is so full.

There are lots of compromises that I have to make when I shop at a store like Albertson’s. Most of the stuff isn’t organic, and most of it is produced by large, industrial concerns. But they’re trying. There are signs of life. In perusing the produce department, there is an organic “section”, albeit all shrink-wrapped, but with stickers on some of the packages saying things like, “Why organic?” and “Why does it cost more?” – with accompanying explanations. So they’re trying to educate, which is encouraging. It’s nice to see organic going more mainstream. But there are some comical inanities too: packages of rice broadcasting that they’re “gluten free.” Well, I certainly hope so.

Warmer weather is coming and with it I hope a surge in energy. I need the Spring.

- Kelly